Memories in (moving) photos. | I miss. (Taken with GifBoom)

Happy Anniversary, CTMJTAers’13! |I have my today’s ‘to do’ list up and ready already, but it seems like I won’t be able to follow it since I’m currently make this long overdue JTA Block blog entry which is nowhere found in my list. Well, it’s not like ‘me not following my personal to-do list’ hasn’t happened before…

Today marks the day that I met the loudest, wildest, weirdest, craziest bunch who accepted my weird, loud, overly-ecstatic and hyper self, and who I have grown to love and cherish so much. 

It’s been officially a year since we started our JTA semester, and looking back at everything that just happened - from the very first day, the hell weeks (months?), the inevitable cramming, sleepless nights, crazy days which are practically every single day, teacher talks, teacher ‘crushes’, random group posts, stalking nights, eat-outs, JTA-blogging, photo-entries like this, the actual JTA, going back, sharing about our experiences with each other, complaining, ranting, rambling, just basically being crazy…up until the very end of the second semester - I feel very… blessed, for the lack of a better word, that I was able to have this experience. Everything that just happened was worth it.

We’re now almost in the middle of the regular summer semester, but I still can’t help but feel so different going back to ‘how things were.’ As Fr. Ferriols said, “Who we are in the end is who we were in the beginning, only more so.” Junior year was really a year of so many changes for me. I still find myself wondering how it would be much more fun in POS class if we were all there, considering how our professor is so wacky, interesting, and very amusing. We would probably be laughing every single day with him, and would get along so well with him, just because we would be laughing at everything he says and does. He may find us loud and weird at first, but give it a day or so, he’d be laughing and be close to us just as how we grew close to our JTA professors even until now. Every day would be fun and interesting, not dull and boring.

Call it whatever you want, but we’ll always be that JTA block the teachers all  remembered as ‘that noisy and crazy block who always seem like they’re high’ but loved anyway. Heh.

(Photo grabbed from Maia)

I’m scared that in month’s time we’ll all be drifting apart, and go on with our lives as if the other doesn’t matter anymore. I fear that this is ‘just’ another memory, and that there’ll come a time when we just see each other in campus and not even greet each other. I am hoping and hoping, that this is different. I’m glad that we still get to see each other every now and then, hanging out at the different establishments around Katipunan for half the day and just talking about random things from where our names came from to the mannerisms each of us have.

I miss all of you guys already, and I really hope I get to see us all together very soon! (coughswinumanatCarissacough)

“This is Mark’s dad Leo : Mark just passed away at 3am Apr 20 at Concord hospital. He is a very brave boy and I am proud of him. Thanks to all of you the support either in Japan and Sydney via facebook, visits, and phone calls.”

…I was browsing through the newsfeed when I suddenly saw a post of my Japanese friend to my Australian friend Mark’s wall. It had “Rest in Peace” in it, and I was wondering if my Japanese friend just made a big mistake translating “Take care” or something… I was hoping that was just it.

But it wasn’t.

Last Friday, as Mark’s dad posted on his account, Mark passed away. I am in tears as I am writing this entry. It was so abrupt - I didn’t expect to hear news like this on a Sunday morning. Even more so, I feel upset for not knowing about this soon, and it feels so sad losing a very close friend. 

We were together back in Japan, and even if he had to leave halfway the semester because of the crucial health problem he had, we were still able to be very close during his stay. We bed him goodbye on his last day in Japan, and we visited him while he was in the hospital. He was such a very nice guy - a brother figure to me - and he was very special…

It’s rare that I lose people around my age… usually, it’s the old ones that I have to say goodbye to, and though either way it hurts so much - it’s the thought that these people who are still so young with so many hopes and dreams - and I can very much relate to this people - have to pass away.

The idea still won’t sink in.

I can’t believe I lost a friend…

“Sa kanyang nobelang DANDELION WINE, inilalarawan ni Ray Bradbury kung paanong namimitas ng bulaklak ng dandelion ang isang mag-anak, ginagawang alak, at iniimbak sa kanilang bodega. Sapagkat tumutubo lamang ang dandelion sa tag-araw, naiipon daw ng alak ng dandelion ang init at galak ng panahong iyon. Kapag kumagat na ang taglamig, bubuksan nila ang isang bote ng alak ng dandelion, at muling lalasapin ang tag-araw na nagbibigay init at ginhawa sa kanila.

Naipaskil ko na ang inyong mga marka para sa panghuling pabigkas na pagsusulit, at diyan nagwawakas ang mahabang tag-araw nitong JTA 2011-2012. Tulad ng isinalaysay ninyo sa akin, gusto niyo mang lasapin at sulitin ang panahong ito, patuloy ang pag-andar ng oras, at unti-unting nagiging alaala na lamang ang mahabang tag-araw na ito. Subalit, kung susundin natin ang payo ni Ray Bradbury, maaaring pakaingatan ang mga alaalang ito, nang, sa pagsapit ng taglamig sa ating buhay, muli nating mararamdaman ang init ng pananabik sa paglalakbay sa ibayong dagat, ang galak ng pakikipagkaibigan, at ang ginhawa ng muling pag-uwi.

Ako man, babalik-balikan ko ang mahabang tag-araw nating ito.

Maraming salamat sa inyong pasensiya. Maraming salamat sa pagiging guro sa akin. Magpakabuti kayo. Hanggang sa muli.”

Sir Roy Tolentino

(BRB CRYING FOREVER. I got chills the whole time I was reading this! HUHU.)

Meaning the whole JTA experience, my whole third year/Junior life just ended, and tomorrow I’ll be coming to school as a Senior.

Meaning today’s the last day I get to be official classmates with my JTA Block, CTM’13JTAers.

I promise I’ll make a decent and a definitely longer post about everything that just happened and how special this block is to me. 

…But for now, let me excuse myself and just cry for a bit more.

ヒノデヤ. | Hinodeya Liquor Shop. Around my area by Nigawa.

This photo is just part of the Photowalk project. I’m currently compiling my Photowalk project back in Japan, and will be presenting this as part of my Photo-Art portfolio for Communications class. 

My Photo-Art portfolio is a compilation of things that I like doing best - taking photos and doing graphics design. I may not be the best at both things, but I can honestly and wholeheartedly say that I love doing both. And for me, that’s what matters. 

TODAY:

> Wasn’t planning on sleeping at all since I was doing Marketing and Theology from yesterday afternoon till morning, but ended up sleeping, even if it was just for an hour. Which led me to muttering a swear the first thing in the morning, at around 5am. I kinda regret swearing after. I don’t want to start my day with that. 

> But I was really stressed out already and the sun wasn’t even up yet! Pretty much everyone in the block was. We had to juggle two very important subjects last night, and no one really planned on sleeping. We pretty much fell asleep at one point or another - yes, even in the bathroom, or on the floor even when you asked your helper to move your bed out of the room just so you wouldn’t be tempted to fall asleep. True story.

> Basically, you can just imagine how everyone, including me, was muttering such colorful words in the morning, some even in different languages (we were too frustrated to the point that we’d speak a foreign language just to express the frustration). I tried reviewing for Theo once I woke up, but then, we had to finish a few more things for Marketing, so we had to juggle with the two again. We were tweeting, editing papers, shouting in frustration, in the brink of tears, trying to review and just basically struggling to get through the whole stressful crap we call this day. Ugh.

> I was such in a hurry after editing the paper for Marketing and attempting to study for Theo since I still had to take a bath, and my mom just called me saying she’d pick me up from the condo to school since she’s dropping by the university for a few requirements of my younger sister. My mom came to pick me up, and I wasn’t even ready yet. Panicking all the way to school which only took us five to seven minutes, anyway. Got to school, found my blockmates/friends there, and we all shared and ranted about how stressful last night and this day was, and how we’re not ready for anything at all. Sigh.

> We still had Statistics class this morning, and though we don’t have any more requirements for the subject and are just going to class for the last lecture applicable for our research paper, we still came to class. Some of us actually thought of not attending the class anymore, but it was the last Statistics class and we, being the infamous block who loves taking photos with out professors on the last day of classes, don’t want to miss it. Good.

> It was surprising to know that he even gave a quiz for our last meeting, actually. We were too stressed about Marketing and Theo to even think about that, and he noticed how we were just staring off into space during the quiz, so he gave us hints about the answer. Hahaha! He gave out the results for our final long exam after, and I’m very much happy with the score I got. Also consulted about my pre-final grade, and I’m just really hoping I get to have the grade I wanted. Good.

> Long break after. We had time to eat, do a bit of Marketing, and studied for Theo. It was so stressful, the school facilities were only open for half the day (since it’s Holy Week) so by lunch time, everything was closing already, and we were forced to move out three times from the buildings we go to. So frustrating!

> We ended up staying by the Foyer near our classroom, but then we discovered that even the classroom’s were already locked for the whole week. We were starting to panic thinking if we’re still gonna have the long test for Theo, and how we’re going to do our Finals Presentation for Marketing, but good thing our Theo prof was able to talk to someone and have a personnel open a room for us. Good.

> The room was open for Theo class only though. We took our exam at class time, 2:30pm. The exam was as confusing and mind-boggling as we expected. It wasn’t the ‘oh gosh, this is really difficult! I don’t know the right answer’ type of test; rather, it’s more like ‘oh gosh, all the choices are right and close with each other! I don’t know the best answer’ type. Of course, the latter is always the harder. It got us confused! The test was really something else. Sigh.

> Had no time to mull over the exam after since there was still the Marketing Finals Presentation we had to do next. We finished by 5pm, and the presentation wouldn’t start until seven, so we had time to prepare the Keynote presentation and practice our parts. We were the last group to present anyway, and the other groups really took their time which left us with such short time to explain ours. We started so late! But the presentation went well, so we’re happy. Good.

> Stayed with my friend Fielle at Coffeebean after for our usual visit there. I’m probably gonna miss going to Coffeebean and studying there for exams during my five-day break, but it’s not like I’m not going back there again anymore. Had Sakura Tea and Blueberry Cheesecake, which was a really good combination. We hanged out there for a while after. Good.

> There’s one guy among the panelists for the Marketing Finals which my blockmates/friends have gone gaga with. I wasn’t particularly captivated by whatever he has that got the others crushing on him, but it’s just really funny talking and giggling about it with them over at Twitter and Facebook. Actually, even until now, at one in the morning, they’re still talking about him. And stalking him. Lol!

> Will finally go back to the province tomorrow for some needed resting! And Comm on the side as well. :)

A block that gets stress together, stays together. | Part two of the field trip from yesterday. Hurray for obligatory class photo with Marketing professor and Zenith representative Miss Tin!

This was at Zenith Optimedia where we had a small talk about Media 101. 

I love my block.

Photo credits to Fielle!

A block that gets stressed out together, stays together. | The JTA Block I have come to love dearly! Just a few more weeks to go and we’ll all be on our own once again… at least, technically. Huhuhu, no, I don’t want that! Got too attached to this bunch of awesome people.

This was at Wee Nam Kee, the Hainanese Restaurant whose name I forgot in my earlier post. 

Photo credit to Fielle!

I had to wake up early today for a recollection I had to go to for my Philosophy class. It’s basically a spiritual session summing up my JEEP experience.

I don’t remember writing in my blog what JEEP actually really is, so a short explanation before anything else: It stands for Junior EngagEment Program. It’s a three-insertion program where we get to immerse in odd jobs/enter in the labor sector, and it’s a requirement for Philosophy Class. My job was as an assistant teacher in a local Day Care Center in Pasig.

Moving on, the recollection was just about any other recollection I attended in Ateneo before - there’s a speaker’s sharing, a prayer session, faith sharing, and confession time. And just like any other recollection I attended before, I was very much into it. And by into it, I mean all my feelings, frustrations, worries, and concerns poured out like a gushing river. The speaker was really amazing and inspiring, despite the profanities he used when sharing. (In fact, the profanities emphasized his whole roller coaster life even more.) I was crying by the second half of his sharing.

We had a short reflection after that, wrote our thoughts on a paper, and had a short faith sharing. Hearing other people’s stories about their JEEP experience and other experiences as well was something else; it felt like everyone was just pouring out all their thoughts in the open, and was being brutally honest. We had a confession session after, and then mass. The confession actually went on till the end of the recollection; not everyone confessed. I was the last person who confessed. I cried.

Letting so much emotions and feeling come out in the open once in a while feels good and light, despite all the tears. I haven’t had a confession in years - only self-penance - and it felt really good just to let things out. My friends waited for me, and we all decided to eat out for lunch. We were all very much excited for the impromptu lunch date ‘cause we’re a lot that day - it’s like a block date! 

We ate at KFC and spent most of our time there just conversing about the most random topics, and things from the past. Like the crazy things we did back in high school in our respective schools, the impressions we have about certain people, the sports we play, the crazy times during the first JTA semester, our first impressions of each other - just about everything. We were all so nostalgic about things, and so happy and sad at the same time that this semester’s about to end, and then we won’t be in the same class again and we’d have to go choose our own classes for our senior year. I mentioned before in this blog how much I love my JTA block, and how they mean so much to me - this stays true until now. And I’m very scared that this semester’s about to end and we won’t be together anymore.

Today has been spiritually and socially productive. Now for the academically productive part of the day… that I have yet to do.